Stealing Joy Read online

  Damn, Gage was good.

  “So the rest of those young men who were in here, they’re sheriffs too?”

  “Oh, no. They’re part of a search and rescue team. We provide services when there is a big man-hunt for missing hikers. We like to get out for a casual hike without any expectations occasionally. If all we ever do is go out for search and rescue, the joy of camping gets lost. It becomes a chore.”

  “We’re really glad you were out there,” my dad said.

  “When do you get to come home?” Mom asked.

  I shrugged. I hadn’t even asked that yet. “Not a clue. I got upgraded to soft solids today.”

  “For an amputation like hers, probably a week. But she had an infection when we brought her in, so maybe longer. You folks have a place to stay? We have plenty of room up at the lodge. You won’t have to worry about a hotel that way.”

  Mom started to say something but Dad jumped in. “That’s very kind. Are you sure we won’t be putting you out?”

  “Not at all. It’s an old hunting lodge. Right now, between seasons, only five of us are living there. We have more rooms than you can shake a stick at.”

  “That’s very kind, but we don’t want to be a bother. And I like to have my own space.” Mom turned Gage down.

  Okay, not that I want my mother to be making googly eyes at the guy I really wanted to bone, but I know she appreciates the finer examples of human males. They didn’t come much finer than Gage, and she hadn’t even blinked at him. Not once. Typically, she would be a little extra giggly, or her eyelashes would start wagging around a good looking guy. But with Gage, nothing.

  Maybe I was delusional and he wasn’t good looking at all, and I was suffering from hero worship or something. What was the Stockholm Syndrome equivalent of falling in love with your rescuer?

  “I understand.” Gage’s voice rumbled through me. “We do have some suites, so it wouldn’t be like a guest bedroom in someone’s house. You can have your own TV, mini fridge, and bathroom. If you plan on staying more than a few nights, hotel rates can get expensive fast. But if you insist—”

  Dad gave Mom a look. I guess he wasn’t too mellowed out today. “We appreciate your offer. I think we’ll be here until we can take Bailey back with us. So yes, we would be delighted to stay at your lodge.”

  The guys came back and Gage directed Travis to take Max back out for a bit, and for Zeke and Mark to show my parents how to get to the lodge. And to get them settled into one of the premium suites. Dang, it sounded like Gage also ran some kind of resort.

  Doggo was not happy about being told to go back out with Travis. He looked at me and then at Gage. It’s like he knew something was up. With a sneeze, a huff, and snarl, he left. That wolf was expressive for a beastie who couldn’t talk.

  As soon as my door was closed, Gage was by my side. His expression earnest. His eyes searched my face. It was all very intense and I was about to close my eyes and lick my lips in a “take me I’m yours” move.

  “We may have narrowed down your Gordon. When I come back later, I should have photos for you to identify. If he is one of these men, Bailey. Shit, woman.” He ran his hand through his hair and began pacing. “There is no easy way to say this—”

  “He was going to kill me. I already know that. I also already know what little fairy tale he was weaving for himself. I was to be his meek distraught wife. Depressed to the point of suicide because I couldn’t bear his children. He laid it all out in a very obvious fashion. But I don’t know why he thought it would work?”

  “Because it’s worked for him in the past. The FBI is coming in. They should be here in a few hours and that makes things tricky.” He sat on the edge of my bed and picked up my hand.

  I let my fingers twist into his. “How tricky?” Mighty Bast he touched me. I’m pregnant. I have to be. “Why the FBI?” I was so proud how cool I played that one off. Gage was impregnating me by magic touch alone and I pretended that I gave a rat’s ass that I’d been lured in by a serial killer.

  “Fucking-A, a serial killer.” I dropped his hand.

  “Yeah. Fucking-A is right.”

  6

  I didn’t know what was going on between Gage and me, but it seemed pretty damned clear that all of a sudden there was a “we.” I mean the guys always deferred to him anyway, but now they did it in a way that felt weird. Before I could ask for one of them to get me some junk food, and as soon as I was on solid food, I could count on Travis to smuggle in some chicken nuggets. Now, he would hem and haw and say he’d have to run it by Gage.

  Look, dude, Gage wasn’t my boss, and other than some serious toe tingling hand holding, nothing had transpired between us.

  If my mom wasn’t around, the doctor would ask Gage about my treatment.

  Hello, I’m right here, stuck in bed with no undies and a back opening hospital gown as my only clothing. Doggo at least listened to me. And I swear it felt like he really was. I could read his noises and yawns better each day. It was almost as if he could talk straight into my head.

  Mom brought me some color stripping shampoo, and I was allowed to attack my hair with my next shower. The pubes responded, and the dye was washing out faster on my hoo-ha than on my head. But then again, that also has something to do with the nature of body hair versus head hair. I’m not sure why, but courser hair likes dye even less than my red hair does.

  I wasn’t going to be a redhead again anytime soon. I needed serious time in a stylist’s chair. Maybe if the brown stuck around, I could parlay it into one of those ombre fade hair color treatments.

  He took my dignity, my identity, my fucking toe. I was going to need some serious time in a therapist’s chair too.

  I scratched Doggo’s ears. “If you find that bastard, kill him for me okay?” I whispered to my fluffy savior.

  He licked my face. He’s a dead man walking. I heard in my head.

  I liked the words I put into this wolf’s mouth.

  We would all kill him for you, but Gage and I will do this.

  I cut my eyes to glare over at Zeke who sat quietly, reading by the window. It didn’t sound like him.

  “You say something?” I asked.

  He looked up, his dark eyes full of concern. “Did you need something, Bailey?”

  “Nope, thought I heard someone. Must have been out in the hall.”

  You heard me. There is no one in the hall. You’ll be able to hear me better and better as our bond continues to develop and become strong.

  I looked at Doggo. “Stop freaking me out.”

  He whined and put his head down.

  I was getting bored, which was a good sign. I was healing. My toe itched like a son-of-a-bitch, also a good sign. I was ready to leave this place. My doctor wasn’t. He wanted me to stay in the area. Mom had announced the second I was sprung she was packing me in the car and taking me back to St. Louis.

  Gage also wanted to keep me in the area for their investigation. Apparently, he and the doc pulled some strings to keep me. So, instead of expecting to be hospitalized for the rest of the week, it was more like another ten days.

  My toe throbbed. I hit the call buzzer for Tracey.

  “I need ibuprofen,” I answered when she asked what I needed. “And a trashy romance.” I doubt she heard me regarding the book.

  She came in, scruffed Doggo behind the ears, and handed me my pills. “Are you sure I can’t get you something else?”

  I shrugged. In the past three days, we had tried Percocet, the codeine sort of helped but it didn’t last long enough. Instead of playing pain killer roulette, I knew that a big Motrin would take the sharp edges off, and that was the best I was going to get. When it really hurt, I held on to Doggo tightly and watched the one action movie they had available on the hospital’s television. The middle of the night was the hardest.

  There were times I’d hurt so bad I couldn’t move, just hold on. And somehow my guards knew I needed an extra boost. I never noticed them slipping into bed with me, but I
would wake up surrounded by a hot guy holding tight on one side and me holding tight to Doggo on the other. Their comfort was better than any drug.

  As much as their comfort helped, I couldn’t help but notice Gage was never one of the men in my bed.

  Speaking of, he strolled through my door as if it were his house.

  “Thought you might be bored.” He handed me a bag.

  “Oh, pressies,” I declared as I began pulling a selection of smutty and Amish romance books out of the bag.

  I held up one particularly titillating Amish title, A Suitor of Hope. “You’re kidding me right?”

  “Zeke texted me, said you wanted trashy romances. I don’t read that shit. Give me Jack Reacher or Clive Cussler any day.”

  At least he read. “I should make you read one, so we can talk about it,” I teased.

  He smoldered at me. My limbs went weak.

  “I’ll read one of yours if you read one of mine.”

  That’s it, I was done. My throat went dry, my mouth filled with drool. Other places in my body got damp.

  I tried to pull myself back together. I wanted to run away from his flirting, but the best I could do was a painfully slow hobble. And that was with help. “Okay, but I don’t think it’s going to be one of these. Bring on your spy thrillers. I’ll find a good tawdry romance for you. I think it will need to involve kilts and time travel.”

  “That doesn’t sound like romance. Time travel?” He laughed and pulled up a chair.

  His hand found mine, and my heart rate skipped as our fingers twisted together.

  You’re mine first.

  I blinked and looked around. Now I know that wasn’t Zeke, and Gage hadn’t said anything.

  I looked at Doggo. It felt like his eyes bore into me. I shivered.

  He can have you, but you are mine first.

  I stared at the wolf. I started to pull back, he was creeping me out. The voice in my head was the same one I used when I pretended Doggo was talking, but there was no way I would make up something like that. No way. My brain didn’t think I needed to belong to some animal. It wanted Gage.

  “Max, stop scaring her. Get out of her head.”

  I flinched and pulled back from Gage.

  “Hey, Zeke, why don’t you take a break. I’ll sit this shift.” Gage turned to face the other man.

  “Sure thing, boss.” Zeke packed up his few things, phone and book. He smiled at me on his way out the door. “Let me know if any of us needs to pick anything up.”

  Gage nodded. He watched the other man leave before he stood up, crossed the room, and closed my door.

  “You read romances with time travel, so maybe you can deal with a little real-world science fiction.” Gage started. “Max there is a bit more than some highly trained, intelligent wolf. And me and the guys are a bit more than really protective and possessive.”

  He stopped and looked at Doggo. It was very much as if they were communicating but not using words. Every now and then, one of them would glance over at me. It was weird, surreal. I didn’t have the right kind of pain meds for this shit.

  “You won’t believe me if I tell you everything because I have no way to prove anything today. Can you accept there are monsters and magic, and things science cannot explain in this world?”

  I nodded. Of course, I could believe that. There were too many strange and unexplained happenings.

  “Max has decided to speak to you, so you can understand him. He can get into my head as well. It’s possible that someday, you and I will be able to share thoughts without words.”

  I laughed, “A lot of couples can do that after being together. They get on the same wavelength.”

  As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I blushed. Gage, me, a couple. Oh, gods.

  “Exactly.” He smiled and picked up my hand again.

  Holy Hecate. Oh, God. Yes, please. I needed to calm down.

  “But this is a little different than an old couple who have been together forever. This is more I’ll be able to send you pictures and concepts.”

  “So you’re telling me Doggo, Max, can talk to you? And that the crazy murder voices in my head are really him?”

  Gage leaned over and rubbed his chin on my fingers. Damn if I wasn’t pregnant again. He sighed. “I’m sure some of those murder voices are your own. If he’s telling you we will hunt down this Gordon and slaughter him, that might actually be him.”

  He looked into my eyes. His gaze shifted and he picked up a strand of my hair and rubbed it between his fingers. “I might do it just for what he did to your hair. I’ve always been partial to redheads.”

  I was a quivering collection of human-shaped cells waiting to dissolve into a puddle of ooze.

  That’s when he kissed me.

  His breath was warm and his lips were soft. I closed my eyes and let Gage fill all of my senses. He skimmed his hand behind my head and grabbed a fist of my hair, holding me to him. I started to reach for his neck and Doggo growled low in his chest. I smacked his nose. No dog was going to tell me to stop kissing this hunk of a man. I refused to listen to any of the words Max was trying to put into my head.

  All I could think was lips, warm, kiss, yes. Colors and lights danced behind my eyelids. Gage’s low moan was all I heard.

  He licked his lips and sighed when he pulled back. “I’ve wanted to do that for days.”

  “What took you so long?” I wanted to cry with the sheer amazement of his mouth on mine.

  “You haven’t been well, Bailey. I wasn’t going to take advantage of you. And I certainly wasn’t going to push something you might not want.”

  “Why wouldn’t I want you to kiss me?”

  When he answered, I felt stupid. “Honey, you’re the victim of abuse and rape. I wasn’t about to come near you until I thought for certain…”

  Yeah, that made sense.

  “You kiss really, really well. I know exactly why I’d like you to kiss me some more. But other than the promise that under this brown hair dye there is a redhead, why did you want to kiss me?”

  Gage stepped back. He took a few pacing steps and ran his hand over the back of his neck. “That might be best left to monsters, and magic, and mental wavelengths?”

  I laughed. I liked that one better than love at first sight. But I wasn’t much to fall in love with based on the condition I was in. When I ran out of the car, the side of my mouth was purple and green and my lips were swollen. I had a vivid green, yellow, and black bruise around my eye. I was cold and sick, and my hair was a greasy mess, having not been washed since Gordon dyed it several days earlier. I wasn’t pretty and feisty. There was no sparkling personality to dazzle him.

  “Unless you have a thing for bruised up, half dead, sick women you find in the woods, I might have to get you to expand on that. But for now, okay, I’ll accept that as a reason.” I sighed.

  “Okay, then chalk this up to monsters and magic. You’re about to get your period, I’ll send one of the guys out to get you—”

  “Nope.” I cut him off. “I would die of embarrassment.”

  “Fine, then I’ll do it. What do you want? Tampons or pads?”

  I covered my face. Help me Hecate, hot guy and grown-up talk. “Tampons, regular.”

  I lowered my hands. “Hey, how the hell can you tell?”

  “Your scent is changing. More metallic, copper and iron. Blood.”

  “My scent? You can smell me? Right, monsters and magic, and just go with it. What? Do I have to wait until a full moon?”

  Gage stopped moving and stared at me. He didn’t move. He might not have been breathing.

  I started shaking my head. Oh, hell no. “That’s not real. No. No way. No.”

  “Can we leave it for now?”

  “I’m on drugs, and no. No.” I held up a single finger. Wait, just wait a minute while I wrap my brain around that. “No.”

  I held my hands up.

  “I’m gonna leave. I’ll be back later.”

  I pointe
d at the door. “Yeah, you go.”

  The door clicked behind him, and for the first time since I came to after surgery, I was alone. There was no one to guard me. Panic burned the back of my throat with bile. What if Gordon found me?

  Doggo nosed under my arm, so it dropped onto his back.

  You are safe with me.

  7

  Tracey came in with a clatter, and her hands full of something she was unwrapping.

  “Are you ready to start walking?” she asked.

  “Walking? I don’t have a toe.”

  “All the more reason to get you up and about, you need to find your balance. And we don’t want you developing clots.” She looked around my empty room. “Where are all your keepers?”

  I shrugged.

  “I was counting on one of them helping you.”

  “I’ve got Doggo.” I pointed out.

  She shook her head. “Not until you’re a little more stable. I need someone who can catch you.” She said putting the package she had, what I could now see as some type of boots, on the working counter with all the medical stuff. “Have one of those fine young men come and get me when they get back, and we’ll get you all set.”

  She left.

  I picked up one of the books Gage brought. “Hmm, Amish romance.” Why not, love is love right?

  I settled in and started reading.

  I made it a good three or four chapters into Ruth’s angst over Jerimiah, who spent part of his Rumspringa living with the English. Now he exhibited the occasional hint of not holding with tradition. Dude was an Amish bad-boy. I guess the bad-boy appeal was universal. I kept reading even though I knew she was going to tame his wild ways.

  There was a knock on my door and the two FBI agents I met earlier came in. Last time they had arrived with Gage, and a stack of photos for me to look at and identify.

  If I had my phone, it would be easier. I had pictures of Gordon.

  Today, neither of them carried that tell-tale folder of photos or note pads.